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Grumbling to himself, Norm stripped off his shirt and pulled the lawn mower from the cool cavern of the garage into the stifling heat of a cloudless August afternoon. He went back into the garage briefly to retrieve the gas can, filled the mower, returned the gas can, and then pressed impatiently on the primer button to ready the mower to start. After a few seconds of priming, he stood and squeezed the starter bar to the handle, grabbed the rip cord and yanked it once and then twice, and then the mower roared to life.

Norm pushed the rumbling mower from in front of his garage and started out along his long lawn, towards the road. As he mowed he fumed mentally about his wife, Drucilla! Bitch was on the rag AGAIN! Ever since they'd rolled out of bed this morning, she'd been on his back about everything! Why didn't he make more money?! Why didn't he treat her parents nicer?! Why did he leave the toilet seat up at night?! Why did he chew his breakfast cereal so loud?! Why were all of his socks in the dirty clothes hamper?! On and on and on in a mind numbing procession of complaining!

He loved his wife, but she had two distinct personalities - extremely nice and extremely nasty! And poor Norm never knew which one would appear when! It often drove him to distraction! Today, it had driven him out into the blistering heat of mid-afternoon. Anything to get away from Druicilla for awhile!

...

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