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Looks by John Instep Comments, please, to John_Instep@hotmail.com

Chapter 1 It was so ordinary when it came. One day we were us, the next not us; crowded, somehow no longer alone and it felt as if part of me had died. It wasn't even as of it were entirely my making. I could have coped with that, internalised the blame, cauterised it, taken comfort in the blame. But the sad and inevitable fact was that it was of Susan's making too and now she was in the next room doing something very ordinary, just ironing a dress.

I go next door and she smiles at me, her beautiful rich mouth widening in that slightly open-lipped smile she keeps for special smiles. This one for me. I see the glint of her wet tongue as her lips part. She deliberately tips back her head slightly in a gesture I remember. I look at her slightly sadly and she catches my gaze, her pupils darkening as she deliberately opens her eyes wider, like someone stepping into a theatre, clearing their vision to see better in the gloom. I know that gesture too. She uses it when we make love, to excite me at a distance. She would sit before me just before my climax, having cajoled and stroked me to a point of idiocy in my lust, panicking at the thought of her ability to stay apart from my rising passion. How arrogant she seemed, how beautifully manipulative as she played her nails around my urethra, smiling deeply and taking back her head as she smiled lovingly into my eyes, her little scarlet nail insinuating itself into the end of me as her other hand cupped my ...

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