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Day 1. After a long wait for our bags at the airport we finally found a taxi that would take us to our hotel. An hour and a half later we arrived at the most magnificent building and gardens that was stuck in the absolute middle of nowhere.

As patience isn't one of his virtues Rob wasn't happy even though it had been him who had booked this ‘bargain holiday' over the Internet. At the reception desk we had more problems. It quickly became evident that German tourists mainly used the hotel as the staff hardly spoke any English. Being typical Brit's we obviously didn't speak German or Spanish or anything other than English. As there was a problem with our reservation this meant that we were having terrible problems trying to register. Then, out of the blue, a ‘white knight' appeared.

Well, not a real ‘white knight' but a group of 5 teenage German boys wearing shorts and basketball vests as if they had just returned from the beach. "Hello. Can I help?" the tallest asked in a faultless English with only the merest hint of a German accent. "We can't get booked in mate." Rob muttered. "Can I see?" he asked as he took our Internet receipt from my husband. The boy read it carefully then spoke politely to the young girl behind the counter. They each pointed at various parts of the document until the girl grinned and went into her office.

The boy handed Rob the receipt back. "She confused you with someone who ...

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