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Abby's diary continues as she recounts her first day in a self-defense class at community college....

Seven students, and all of us were female. I was the oldest, being in my mid-fifties and the rest, well, they were young but, if you ask me (and allow me to be anything but "PC") so darned ugly that they'd better have signed up to defend against muggers--- because they sure as hell weren't going to have to worry about sex fiends !

[Forgive me, please. I'm sure that such fiends don't really care how attractive a gal is, but I've been in a catty mood all day].

Anyway, our instructor, Mr. Hands, was a former "tag-team wrestler," whatever that means, and he once went by the name of "Leg-lock Larry LaVoyeur." He said he'd picked that for a "stage name" because he'd leap into the ring and leer at women in the audience; he somehow thought that leering at women and peeping through windows was the same thing. Simply put, I guess he was kind of a dumbass, but I figured that a high IQ wasn't necessary when it comes to fending off attacks by weirdos and crackheads.

Larry, as he insisted we call him, had other credentials, and he rattled off his having been a US Marine, a police officer in Detroit, and a "grappler of the Gracie school of fighting." None of us knew what that last part meant, but he basically said that he was an expert at getting ...

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