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THE COACH ON THE BUS

by The Tall Man

It all began with what seemed like a harmless jerk off competition between the lads, a spontaneous lark to relieve (har har) the boredom on the journey home to Newcastle after this year's 18 to 21 age group inter-counties athletics championship at Crystal Palace, London; it was June and pretty hot weather, for a change.

What we didn't know immediately was that the athletics coach, Peter, had been left behind; nobody noticed, not even his wife Carol until we had been rolling for almost an hour. By then we were just onto the M1 motorway going north after our team bus had weaved its way across London through very difficult traffic congestion. Carol had got a call on her mobile phone from Peter and as she talked, she began looking around her, as though she could hardly believe he wasn't on the bus with us. We heard later from those sitting near Carol that Peter was hopping mad; but he finally told her not to have the driver worry about turning back at that late stage. He had been running around in ever decreasing circles (ageing 400 metres runner that he was), and had been fortunate enough to find another team bus in the car park of Crystal Palace which was also travelling roughly north but not to Newcastle; knowing at some point he would have to change modes of transport, he took the only available solution right then to being stranded a long ...

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