Bed Seventeen (fm:sex at work, 4249 words)

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"Great," I said. "Just what we need."

I've heard some horror stories from other nurses, of course. Tales of patients - male patients, always. Not all men but always a man, right? - with weird kinks who get bored in their beds and have nothing better to do than to harass the staff being paid to look after them. But on Ward F it's usually fine.

I'll spare you the grisly details about exactly what sorts of cases we look after here, but let's just say we see men who've had surgery in... let's call it intimate areas, shall we? Most of them are in pain, dealing with the embarrassment of having dressings changed and being prodded and poked in their most private of places all day every day. Sex is generally the last thing on their minds, and we tend to get left alone. But it sounded like bed 17 had other ideas.

Thankfully I was on nights, so as I gathered my things and sat through the handover I thought that I probably wouldn't have to worry about him too much.

How wrong I was.

The first time I saw him was early the next morning, three-ish. He was scheduled for surgery that day and so I went to do a bedside check to make sure there was no food or water nearby. I expected him to be sleeping, but it's never a surprise when patients are awake at that time. Quite aside from the pain and discomfort, hospitals just aren't easy to sleep in. There's always a light on, there's always someone awake and making noise, there's always something beeping or being wheeled along the ward. So I wasn't shocked when he spoke as I was cleaning away the jug of water that had been left by his bed.

"I haven't met you yet," he said, his voice low and rough.

"You haven't," I said. "How are you feeling?"

"Thirsty," he said. "And sore. Can I get some more pills?"

I smiled and shook my head. "Sorry. You're nil-by-mouth now until you go into surgery."

He laughed, shifted under the thin bed sheet. I saw his hand snake down to his crotch. Here it comes, I thought.

"Well, I can think of something that might help with the pain."

I raised an eyebrow. "Meaning?"

"I might be nil-by-mouth, but you aren't."

I turned away from him, reached down to the bottom of his bed to grab his chart. "Next of kin is listed as your wife," I said. "I'm sure she'd be delighted by what you just said."

He started to speak again but I cut him off. It's always best to take a firm hand in these sorts of situations. "I need to hang some fluids for you. I'll get some painkillers up with them, too." And before he could say anything else I walked away.

"You were right," I said in the morning when Jen arrived back on the ward to hand over.

"I was?" she asked.

"Bed seventeen."

She rolled her eyes as I told her what he'd said, and how I'd made sure to request good strong painkillers to knock him out for the rest of the night so that he wouldn't bother me again. "He's scheduled for this morning," I said, "so he probably won't bother you much today, at least."

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Kevin writes Sun 6 Apr 2025 12:05:

I liked it. You can never go wrong with a handjob at the job!!

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Kevin writes Sun 6 Apr 2025 09:13:

I liked it. You can never go wrong with a handjob at the job!!

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