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Chapter Thirty Five

THE WHIP HAND

After the sheer nastiness of what had been done to me on that country walk of my last visit, I was more than usually uneasy about the next time I was ordered up to Manor Farm. But in the event, the next two visits were relatively uneventful. That is to say they followed the usual pattern of sexual abuse and casual cruelty but with no new obscenities. Indeed, a new thought began to insinuate itself in my mind: was it possible that we were slipping into a routine, that the five and a half year relationship was running out of steam? Perhaps it was time to "grow up" and leave this dependant, master/slave business behind me? But then an image of his powerful, hairy body would slide into my mind and I would feel the old hungry longing to kneel between his legs and bury my face in his crotch. I would think of his quiet strength and authority and command and it would swamp me with a desperate longing to abase myself before him.

Then on one of my regular Monday phone-ins he said he wanted me on Wednesday. This threw me into a spin, for in all these years he had never demanded anything other than a Friday or week-end attendance and usually he'd give me a couple of weeks warning. I was excited by the apparent urgency and novelty of this but then a dreadful thought struck me and I wailed "But I can't, Sir, not this Wednesday. We've got the ...

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