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When I was in high school I wasn't exactly a chick magnet. It wasn't all my fault, mind you. I went through puberty much later than the other boys, but when I did, my body went overboard. In an 18-month period I grew a full foot, and I was tormented by horrible growing pains that woke me up screaming every other week.

The physical pain was bad enough, but the emotional pain was worse. I outgrew my clothes so fast that my parents put off the inevitable shopping trips as long as they could, meaning I went to school in jeans three inches too short. I had funny, dorky clothes, and a funny, dorky body inside them. I grew so fast that I couldn't control my own body, I was always tripping over my feet and hitting my head on low-hanging lights. I shot up to six-foot-five and I weighed like 150 pounds. My nickname, of course, was "Stork". I hated, hated, hated that name.

My parents told me not to worry. My mom and dad are both tall, and not bird-skinny like I was. "You'll fill out, don't worry," Dad told me. "I was the same way you were, and I gained 40 pounds in a year. Eat your Wheaties and you'll be fine."

Sure. While everyone else was making out in the back seats of cars, I had trouble even getting into the back seat of a car. My Friday and Saturday nights were consistently dateless. What girl, I thought, would ever find a big skinny gork like me attractive?

...

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