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My wife of 20 years and I were sitting on the couch watching TV when I began talking about our sex life. Since our second child was born 16 years ago sex had become less and less frequent until now it was good if it was once a month and almost always in our bedroom in the missionary position. Over those 16 years I had periodically tried to coax her in to making love more frequently, in different positions, in different places and [heaven forbid] with other partners. But every time she would tune me out, sometimes getting mad at me for bringing it up and making our lovemaking even less often. But I was really getting frustrated with where we were now and I wanted more in our sex lives. So here I was risking less in the hopes that something might snap and make things better. You need to understand that there is also a rather direct correlation between our declining sexual frequency and her increasing weight. She had gained a lot of weight in the last 5 or 6 years and this made her feel less and less attractive despite my attempts to tell and show her otherwise. So I was bringing up the subject again and it was going over just about as well. She kind of agreed we should try more frequently but that she could not have sex when the kids were up and around the house. She was less receptive to different positions saying that with her weight they were hard, uncomfortable or impossible (although we had not tried to find out) and even less responsive to different places worried that she would be seen with all her fat. Well you can imagine how I thought she would react to other partners. "Yeah right," she said "who are we going to find that wants to be with me?" Thinking quickly I said "Well how about Tim?" ...

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