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KENTUCKY FRIED YANKEE LAWYER

By Stardog Champion

Its amazing the things the human mind can conjure given an extreme amount of boredom, misery or frustration. Given a healthy dose of all three at the exacxt same time, it stands to reason that even a rationale person might be tempted to stab a fountain pen all the way into their eye before puncturing their brain.

For a few tedious seconds, 27 year old Pete Finnegan had to fend of the urge to do just that as he sat at his work desk, drowning in the miserable strains of the blue grass music coming from one of his co-worker's radio a few cubicles over.

Granted the first puncturing stab would be painful, but considering the Chinese water torture accumulation of each dreadful note seeping into his ears, quick death wasn't such a bad option.

Dropping said pen down on the pile of files scattered across his desk before he actually did go through with it, Petey (as his friends back in Greenwich, Ct called him) leaned back in his rickety, third hand office chair, put his hands behind his head and sighed disgustedly. Staring up at the dingy tiles lining the ceiling, Pete cursed every decision, big and small, that eventually landed him in that rural, west ...

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