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A loud scream a foot from my head brought me out of a sound slumber. I rolled out of bed and bounced to my feet, hands up and ready to fight ... an empty doorway. Tammy was still screaming, I turned to see what the problem was. I half-expected a huge spider or cockroach, but I was really looking for a snake, since we occasionally get them in the house, and the cat loved to present them to us for our appreciation. What I didn't expect was for her to be staring at me in terror, clutching the blanket tight and backed against the wall.

"You stay away from me! I'll I'll I'll call the police! You pervert! How did I get here!? What did you do to me?!"

Not exactly what a man wants to hear from his wife first thing in the morning. "Babe, what's wrong? Did you have a nightmare?"

"Don't you 'Babe' me! I don't know who you think you are, but you let me out of here or so help me I'll..."

I stepped away from the door, making sure she had a clear path to it. "Hold on, Tams, calm down..."

"DON'T YOU TELL ME TO CALM DOWN! How do you know my name? What am I doing here? Where are my parents? Where am I?"

This was not shaping up to be the romantic morning playtime I had been ...

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